5 x 5 - Writing Exercise

This is a piece of automatic writing that I did after the other tasks as an evaluation. I wrote for 25 minutes without stopping to properly punctuate or think about what I was writing- I think the result is pretty interesting.

When I look back on the work that I did over the summer I see many different types of my artistic expression coming through including but not limited to silhouette and use of negative space and use of colour and different ways of editing the same image and my own way of seeing and visualising what makes me happy like how I chose to draw a fox for task 5 because it is my favourite animal I think that they’re really cute and also quite elegant in ways and I wanted to try and make sure that I showed that and do it justice so I decided I would draw it digitally since that is the medium I feel most comfortable with but I still tried to draw it in a way that looked sketchy and traditional because I feel like that particular kind of style really shows off what I was trying to portray in that the fox is an elegant animal yet it can still be really cute and also for task 5 I drew my dad because I really love him and he also makes me happy I realised that I’d never really drawn him before so I felt like now would be a good time to try that since I had just done the fox in a realistic manner even though I don’t really do realism much I felt warmed up to try it again so that’s how I drew my dad for this and I was really excited to show it to him and seeing him smile when I showed him made me really happy so I’m glad that I chose to do it it made the work I put into it completely worth it I think that that might be one of the things I love most about being an artist is to see peoples faces and see what kind of emotions I invoke in people with my work it’s a really powerful and good feeling to really see that work pay off like that I also drew a warhamster because it was a funny way of combining an animal with a human but also using something very personal to me that I really really love and makes me happy and relaxed whenever I make them which is Warhammer models I really love painting Warhammer because it helps me wind down and use the more artistic side of my brain even though a lot of the time I am aiming to match a pre given colour scheme and pre given patterns I don’t have to think when I paint all that much and I never actually get stressed when I do it for some reason even though I get stressed if things go wrong with practically every other aspect of my life including other forms of art and things that I do for fun I just never get stressed with it so it always feels like an escape from the hectic expectations of the rest of my life even though most of those expectations are self imposed and not really necessary I have just always felt that if I don’t do my best in everything even if my best isn’t enough for me sometimes then I’ve failed at something and I’m still not quite sure what I would have failed at but that fear is always there so its nice to escape sometimes and speaking of doing my best I did so much work for task 3 which was my 30 seconds video which actually ended up being 31 seconds so that it would finish more nicely but still I worked so hard on it I did proper animation for the first time because I thought it would be fun I also thought that it would only take me like a week or so to do it since it was so simple and how hard could it really be but I was so so wrong because it took me over 2 weeks to complete and I counted the number of hours I worked at the end and it was 67 and I was so shocked because while I was still proud of what I had created I thought it would maybe seem slightly more impressive for something that I had spent so many hours of my life getting stressed over and working on let me tell you when I had finally finished it it felt super weird to rest like I felt that I might have missed something super important or something and as it turns out I had actually left a couple big marks on the video from scrolling through the frames while working but sadly fixing those will now be impossible otherwise I would fix them because they are visually distracting and they make it seem not as good quality but still I can’t fix those now so I’ll learn to live with it and do better next time in not leaving those there because ahhhh its so annoying but I did enjoy adding the sound effects at the end because it let me add things that I love and make me happy to it because I really like Pokémon and the franchise is really inspiring to me and has made me happy a lot over the years and it feels a lot like a safe space that I can return to whenever I really like and I also used my dog Penny to help me animate it because I did rotoscoping and Penny makes me really happy too she’s very fluffy and cute and gentle and I like cuddling her and she is always so energetic and inquisitive on her walks so that inspired me to do the rotoscoping because I thought seeing her while working would keep me happy but in the end it just annoyed me because she was so fluffy that the frames were super blurry and hard to draw over but oh well the end result is still good but anyway I need to talk about the other tasks that I did like task 4 I enjoyed it so much I usually hate being in front of a camera and prefer being behind it but it was really cool to step out of my comfort zone and do it anyway it actually helped me love myself a bit more because I would never really think of myself as very pretty but I presented myself in such a way that I felt really pretty and happy and I really liked what I chose to wear because it was a mix of both fashion and comfy I really like steampunk and Victorian fashion and modern fashion so I mashed it all up and if it were more socially acceptable to wear a corset around like that casually then I absolutely would because it makes me feel pretty and confident and its actually super comfy even though a lot of people think that corsets are really tight torture devices and stuff but no this one is really nice both of them are actually but I prefer the bigger beige and brown one it goes well with yellow I think yellow really suits me even though my favourite colour is blue I’ve started using yellow a lot more in my art since I realised that I think I never noticed it until now